You know you are a railfan if....
l.On your railfan outings, the four food groups become: McDonalds, Taco Bell, Pizza Hut, and Mr. Donut.
2.Your car has a bumper sticker that says "This vehicle stops at all railroad crossings.
3.Despite common sense and the instructions that came with the camcorder, you still shoot videos into the sun.
4.Your railfan territorial dominance is enough to scare away The Black Panthers.
5.You carry a saw and a BB gun in your camera case to remove ALL obstacles from your shot.
6.You have a denim vest or jacket that has more patches than the earth has hydrogen molecules.
7.You've considered contacting the police to obtain permission for using flashing red lights and siren during a train chase.
8.The sound of a K5LA off in the distance does more for you than a double-shot of prozac and cocaine.
9.Your definition of the best type of railroad photograph: the "Three-quarter, no-thought roster shot".
lO.Your definition of the best night shot: the "Three-quarter, no-thought roster shot", lit up like the Space Shuttle on
launchpad 39B.
ll.Your car's license plate is customized with a locomotive designation, railroad initials, or
both.
12.You've been known to stand on the roof of your car to get that shot over the fence.
13.Your scanner is on 24 hours a day, seven days a week.
14.You still live with your parents because you spend too much money on Kodachrome.
15.You don't realize how stupid or suspicious you look to passing motorists as you stand out in
the middle of nowhere with a camera around your neck.
16.Summer weekends for most men: Beer, Babes, Boats, and Barbecue; Summer weekends for
you: refer to #15.
17.The number 614 gets you more excited than the number 69.
18.Great moments in your personal history: Learning to ride a bike, graduating from high
school, and your first photograph of foreign motive power.
19.Your cat's name is "Chessie"
20.Your dog's name is "Conrail"
21.Your wife threatened to divorce you because you wanted to dye Conrail's fur blue.
22.Its hot as hell out, the lead unit doesn't have AC, and you still don't understand why the crew has to leave the front door
open.
23.Class I railroads: Alco's suck. Railfans: Alco's Rule!!!
24.You can tell the difference between a U23B and a B23-7.
25.If the dispatcher loses track of a locomotive consist, he usually calls you at home for help. Continued on Page 15